That isn't to say there aren't people who have successfully reached "Remission" and are now actively living healthy and functional lives, because I am certain there are. The idea, however, that there is always this illnesses lurking around the corner, perhaps faded into the background, is something I tend to find scary.
Relapse is something I have dealt with a few times thus far, and I would first like to apologize that I have been on a hiatus of sorts. I made a vow to remain transparent with you all, however- This is our journey. And so, I must confess that my most recent relapse is perhaps the most difficult one I've faced.
If there is anything I've learned in which I deem of great importance to remember throughout this journey, it is that mental illness are comprised of so many different aspects that it is nearly impossible to see a Relapse coming. Biology, Physiology, Genetics, Environment, Experience, Personality, Temperament and how all of these different components interact with each other are what form the basis of our lives and, ultimately, what cause the opportunity for a relapse to happen.
I'm sure that some of you know that feeling, when your mind balances itself for a short while, and you begin to feel relief. You feel a degree of excitement and interest and curiosity, and begin trying to fill your plate with activities or people or experiences to help move you forward. If you are anything like me, however, you may become slightly more eager (and stubborn) than you should, and suddenly your successful climb becomes a snowball that's somehow made it's way far down a hill you never suspected. But you are not alone.
During these times, I'd like to remind all of you, as well as myself, that the smallest steps are the ones that make the greatest strides. Show yourself kindness and compassion, and allow yourself to be patient with your successes. Remind yourself about your Inner Child, and show yourself the same sense of love that you would show your best of friends.
Showing yourself love is one of the most healing powers we have in this battle.
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Alycia